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Black Friday Sale On Now.

Funny stories!

I've had a absolutely **** start to the week, i'm massively frustrated and ready to explode!!!!!!!
Every single thing that can go wrong is going wrong.

Got any funny stories involving snuff or not involving snuff!? Just anything to take my mind off how rubbish it's been.
i'm sure i'll pipe up and let you guys know a story or two once morale has lifted a bit
Just want to cry! 

Comments

  • WhalenWhalen Member
    Well.....my first snuff, NAVY, driving back home after purchase....put open can right up against my nose to sniff. Hoovered up about a teaspoonful and had to pull over and fight off a seizure for about 20 minutes. Never had Navy snuff since. It is a wonder I ever snuffed again.

    Not a funny story, but one of my favorites - I binged on bulk Wilsons when they had the internet sale. I wrote them that that they had substituted Tom Buck for Queens Extra Strong. 

    They explained that there was no difference between the two. Several weeks later I received a package from them, inside was a one pound bulk tub of snuff with both the Tom Buck and Queens Extra Strong labels on it. A very nice hand written note suggested I remove the offending sticker, which ever one I preferred.
    That note and a wonderful "With compliments Wilsons&Co. (SHARROW) LTD., are one of my prize possessions. That tub remains double vacuum sealed with both labels intact. I cherish the entire experience!
  • edited March 7 PM
    This guy on you tube loves White Elephant Snuff. Just watching it makes me smile. Don't try this at home kitties.
    My knowledge is worthless if not shared and applied . "Joseph McKenna"  
  • WhalenWhalen Member
    Holy Jebsus! No...!
  • I think that actually is @Basement_Shaman non-paternal twin brother.
  • Yea if I was 150lbs heaver and 10 yrs younger.  My beard is snow white. And I speak with an American accent . You could blind fold this fellow with dental floss. Be nice now! =))
    My knowledge is worthless if not shared and applied . "Joseph McKenna"  
  • If you freeze it at 0:06 it looks like a piece of sponge in the top of the tin. The first time it is up to his nose there is very little showing the second time much more. I think when the tin is out of view he push the sponge down the second time he raises it you can see it protruding over the edge. 
    You can fool some of the people some of the time. Momma  didn't raise no fool [-X
    My knowledge is worthless if not shared and applied . "Joseph McKenna"  
  • JscentJscent Member
    This pipe smoking chap 

  • image009.jpg 
    My knowledge is worthless if not shared and applied . "Joseph McKenna"  
  • Compensating for something? ;)
  • image018.jpg 
    My knowledge is worthless if not shared and applied . "Joseph McKenna"  
  • image003.jpg 
    My knowledge is worthless if not shared and applied . "Joseph McKenna"  
  •    Phone rings, woman answers. A pervert, with heavy breathing, says, "I bet you have a tight ass with no hair"Woman replies, "Yes I do, he's watching golf ?Who shall I say is calling?"inline-image
    My knowledge is worthless if not shared and applied . "Joseph McKenna"  
  • Whilst I was waiting for my prescription at the pharmacy the other day, I asked the pharmacist if Viagra really does perk up ones sex life. 

    The old boy behind the counter said he swore by it, and it kept him and his wife very happy.

    I said   "can you get it over the counter"     he replied    " I would  probably need four tablets for that."


  • Is it true that New Orleans Airport has two customs channels.

    One sign reads                   Nothing to declare.

    The other reads                   I do declare.


  • Whilst standing in the ticket queue at the local swimming baths, I started reading the notices  to pass the time away.

    According to one notice, to stop people urinating in the baths some clever chemicals have been added to the water.   Apparently when a man pees in the water it turns blue and if a woman has a pee the water turns red.

    Bored with the notices I then started watching a group of pensioners swimming up and down.

    They reminded me  of the RAF,  Red Arrows Formation Flying Team !             


  • Walking through Cambridge Massachusetts yesterday (on holiday here) I saw a shop window with the sign Dewey Cheetham and Howe. Got to be the best name for a law firm ever.
  • ArtChooArtChoo Member
    edited April 29 PM

    In the topic of "Your Location" you quoted    "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink."


    Reminds me of an old, old joke.

    A twenty something, gorgeous gold digger latched onto a retired old city gent in London.
    He thought he would show her some of the art and history of the big city.
    A museum,  the Tower of London,  an art gallery and a cricket match would be interesting, but to start with ,
    The Chelsea Flower Show.
    I cannot go wrong with that.    Beautiful gardens laid out,   formal and informal.   Horticulture lectures, and tea and scones etc.  
    All this walking around she moaned, my feet are killing me and this is no good for my hay fever . When you've seen one plant you've seen them all, was her response.

    The old boy lost his rag with her and shouted at her.

    You can take a   whore-ter culture  but you can't maker her think.

    :))


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